Technology

A couple months ago the pinging of incoming text messages prompted me to start paying attention to our cell phone bill. I was blown away when there was a combined 1500 texts sent and received that month.

Taking my disbelief to Facebook, I was assured that 1500? A mere drop in the bucket of teenage excess. That was, like, a weeks worth for most of my friends little darlings.

So the next month I looked again and it had doubled to roughly 3300 combined. Color me shocked yet again. I mean, I know he has a little girlfriend and she lives in another province and THANK GOD they're not phone talkers and costing me hundreds of dollars a month. But really?

Except it seems he's trying to break his own records on a monthly basis. This month I just had to laugh. I don't even know how he has time to do anything else except text. And read texts. And how can he keep up with the constant texting? And ALSO he must have his phone on vibrate because I haven't heard it much more than normal.

7090 received.
7077 sent.

I'll take comfort in the fact that he seems to be a pretty balanced kid? He gives as good as he gets?

Just by the basic math, he's reading AND sending nearly 500 texts A DAY. Mind boggling. By comparison I had 232 for the whole month. I am FAR from cool apparently.

I also have to wonder if there's some hidden actual limit to this 'unlimited' text plan. Because that's some serious value for our money!

I can't help comparing texting to the note writing of my youth. We wrote notes like nobodies business. Hate notes, love notes, notes making plans to buy weed at lunch time, notes talking about boys, notes that made no sense. One of us has a notebook somewhere of one New Years Eve and our drug-induced ramblings that we thought were SO WITTY.

So I'll not begrudge my child his texting. I totally get it.

Temper temper

There's nothing quite as cute as a pissed off 3 year old. They get mad over the weirdest things. Like today, and bananas, and bear paw cookies.

Me: *making a big show* here you go Nicky. Here's your bear paw because you ate all your bananas.
Josh: where's mine mom?
Me: you didn't eat your banana. It's just sitting there. Do you want me to cut it up?
Josh: sure.

So I cut it up and set the bowl in front of him. He's eyeing Nicky up like a hawk and Nicky is making a production out of enjoying his cookie. Meanwhile I sit down across the table from them and flip open my computer, keeping an eye on Josh.

Of  course he tries to be stealthy and sneak his waiting cookie off the counter.

Me: sit your butt down and eat your banana first.
Josh: *stomping over and sitting down* UGH. I hate bananas.
Me: whatever.
Josh: I'm going to squish you with this table.

He proceeds to spend the next 60 seconds trying to push the table into me. He's a strong little bugger and probably could do it. IF I hadn't been keeping it in place, that is. While trying not to laugh.

Finally he gave up and sat looking at his banana with disgust. Suddenly he grabbed his cup of juice and I had visions of washing my floors and walls for the second day in a row. I grabbed it quickly.

Me: what the hell? Settle down buddy.
Josh: I. Want. To. Drink. It.
Me: really?
Josh: yes.

So I cautiously gave it to him and he slammed that sucker back like he was at a frat party. It was IMPRESSIVE. I think he's going to be trouble in about 15 years.

Josh: NOW can I have my bear paw?
Me: no.
Josh: you don't love me.

And then he took off to parts unknown to pout. Of course, Nicky saw this as his opportunity to try and scam the left over cookie. They're nothing if not true to personality.

But seriously, it was more cute than anything. I just wanted to scoop him up and kiss his little scrunched up face. Aw.