3 June 2013

Mr. Sensitive

I write a lot about how wild my kids can be, I'm sure at times I paint a picture of these hooligans who run around unchecked and uncaring of things and people around them. So I thought I'd share what happened tonight.

It was time to come in and I called out the window for the boys to start cleaning up their toys and then it was bath time. As usual, Josh zipped around the yard hauling all the crap to the shed while Nicky kept on playing on his scooter. 

I decided that it was time to reward Josh's good behavior with a little treat. Who knows if that's good parenting or not, we go on instinct over here. 

So I took the treat outside and crouched down in front of Josh and thanked him for putting the toys away and here's a treat and blah blah blah. As you can guess, immediate tears on Nicks part. 

Obviously I explained to him that I asked them both to put the toys away and only Josh listened and that's why Josh got a chocolate. I told him that if he helped next time then he'd get a treat too. I don't think he really heard me though, over his tears. 

Well, as we come inside what does Josh do but break his little chocolate in half and give some to Nicky. When did this kid get so compassionate? 

Either way, I'd consider that a parenting win. And hopefully next time they're both asked to help, the memory of his disappointment is enough to prompt a certain someone to pitch in.

16 May 2013

The Wiggles.

A benefit to having small kids is that they're the perfect weight for walking on your back. C'mon we all do it right? Force our children into being makeshift deep-tissue masseuses. You know it.

Anyway, today I was trying my best to cajole Josh into walking on my back. Hell, I even gave him permission to jump! I EVEN tried to play him and Nicky against each other. 

Me: Oh that's fine Josh, Nicky will be the good boy and walk on mommy's back.

Nicky: Um no, I don't want to.



Anyway, so I asked them why they always walked on daddy's back but they never wanted to walk on mine. They were brutally honest.

Josh: Your legs are wiggly. Your bum is wiggly too. I fall over like this (demonstrating walking on a waterbed)

Nicky: Ya and your back is wiggly too!

Thanks kid, I suppose I can add BACK FAT onto my list of flaws?

In other, totally unrelated news, we're 26 days away from the big move. Last time I posted we were 52 days out. Time is going so so fast, less than 4 weeks to go!

22 April 2013

50 days countdown.

There it is, our new house! Isn't it pretty? 

This whole house selling/buying process has gone pretty fast once I think about it. We got an offer on our house after 24 days on the market, we went and looked at houses the following week and made our own offer right away. This was the third house we looked at (although not the last).

I really didn't think that we'd end up with a newer house. I've always been drawn to older houses with loads of character but unfortunately the community we're moving to just does not have that kind of market in our price range. The ONE house we looked at that was more than 10 years old was a dump. For real. 

But this house grabbed both of us even before we knew it was the house we were looking at, when we were across the street at the 7-11. I would have been devastated if this deal had fallen through. It has more of a personality than any other house we looked at, with neat details that make it unique to us. 

We're all very excited to move. Our little house has seen a lot of life lived in it over the last 6 years and it was perfect for us when we bought it. Family with one kid? Ideal. Family with 3 kids? We've maxed out our space big time. We're bursting at the seams! 

So the countdown is on! Knowing that it's ours is making bumping into each other at the kitchen counter a bit easier to bear. It's making listening to the kids fighting alldaylong a bit more 'musical'. It's making running down to the pantry in the basement because there's not enough room upstairs, no big deal. Having my clothes in the kids closet because there's no room in ours? Soon enough we'll have a walk in closet. 

I can hardly wait!!!

22 March 2013


A couple months ago the pinging of incoming text messages prompted me to start paying attention to our cell phone bill. I was blown away when there was a combined 1500 texts sent and received that month.

Taking my disbelief to Facebook, I was assured that 1500? A mere drop in the bucket of teenage excess. That was, like, a weeks worth for most of my friends little darlings.

So the next month I looked again and it had doubled to roughly 3300 combined. Color me shocked yet again. I mean, I know he has a little girlfriend and she lives in another province and THANK GOD they're not phone talkers and costing me hundreds of dollars a month. But really?

Except it seems he's trying to break his own records on a monthly basis. This month I just had to laugh. I don't even know how he has time to do anything else except text. And read texts. And how can he keep up with the constant texting? And ALSO he must have his phone on vibrate because I haven't heard it much more than normal.

7090 received.
7077 sent.

I'll take comfort in the fact that he seems to be a pretty balanced kid? He gives as good as he gets?

Just by the basic math, he's reading AND sending nearly 500 texts A DAY. Mind boggling. By comparison I had 232 for the whole month. I am FAR from cool apparently.

I also have to wonder if there's some hidden actual limit to this 'unlimited' text plan. Because that's some serious value for our money!

I can't help comparing texting to the note writing of my youth. We wrote notes like nobodies business. Hate notes, love notes, notes making plans to buy weed at lunch time, notes talking about boys, notes that made no sense. One of us has a notebook somewhere of one New Years Eve and our drug-induced ramblings that we thought were SO WITTY.

So I'll not begrudge my child his texting. I totally get it.

1 March 2013

Temper temper

There's nothing quite as cute as a pissed off 3 year old. They get mad over the weirdest things. Like today, and bananas, and bear paw cookies.

Me: *making a big show* here you go Nicky. Here's your bear paw because you ate all your bananas.
Josh: where's mine mom?
Me: you didn't eat your banana. It's just sitting there. Do you want me to cut it up?
Josh: sure.

So I cut it up and set the bowl in front of him. He's eyeing Nicky up like a hawk and Nicky is making a production out of enjoying his cookie. Meanwhile I sit down across the table from them and flip open my computer, keeping an eye on Josh.

Of  course he tries to be stealthy and sneak his waiting cookie off the counter.

Me: sit your butt down and eat your banana first.
Josh: *stomping over and sitting down* UGH. I hate bananas.
Me: whatever.
Josh: I'm going to squish you with this table.

He proceeds to spend the next 60 seconds trying to push the table into me. He's a strong little bugger and probably could do it. IF I hadn't been keeping it in place, that is. While trying not to laugh.

Finally he gave up and sat looking at his banana with disgust. Suddenly he grabbed his cup of juice and I had visions of washing my floors and walls for the second day in a row. I grabbed it quickly.

Me: what the hell? Settle down buddy.
Josh: I. Want. To. Drink. It.
Me: really?
Josh: yes.

So I cautiously gave it to him and he slammed that sucker back like he was at a frat party. It was IMPRESSIVE. I think he's going to be trouble in about 15 years.

Josh: NOW can I have my bear paw?
Me: no.
Josh: you don't love me.

And then he took off to parts unknown to pout. Of course, Nicky saw this as his opportunity to try and scam the left over cookie. They're nothing if not true to personality.

But seriously, it was more cute than anything. I just wanted to scoop him up and kiss his little scrunched up face. Aw.

25 January 2013


Liam: *looking at the school website* Oh good, I don't have any homework.
Me: half your teachers don't even update that anyway, I don't trust it.
Liam: well I do have LA homework but that's a project I need the computer for.
Me: you can use mine.
Liam: no I'll just use my dads.
Me: fine.


Me: do some reading from your Social textbook anyway.
Liam: *showing me the textbook* it's just these pages that he mentioned us reading.
Me: um, what's that sheet sticking out?
Liam: oh. That? That's nothing. Don't worry about it.
Me: *grabbing it* look it's a worksheet! This is perfect, you can do this instead of just reading pages.
Liam: that's from, like, a long time ago. It's really old.
Me: weird, you wrote today's date in the corner.
Liam: COME ON.


Liam: *muttering to himself* I don't even know what pages to find these answers...did you hear me?
Me: *batting eyelashes* oh you're talking to me now? I wasn't sure.
Liam: snark snark, bitch moan and complain.
Me: can it with the attitude, look at the heading, and find it in the textbook.
Liam: I don't even know why you're making me do this. The teacher wants us to do this in class. This is SO UNFAIR.

Poor kid, he has a lot to learn about knowing when to just stop when he's ahead. We fought, I yelled, he listened, he did his homework, I regained my temper, he stomped downstairs. And then I made him clean his room.

Don't piss off your mother.